Thank You!

I was dusting and clearing the cobwebs of my scarred heart, when I met you. It was an ordinary Tuesday evening. We smiled while looking at each other’s eyes and I blushed when we caught ourselves mutually staring at one another.  I remember how we found ourselves sustaining an unending jabber, talking about anything and everything. I will always remember how you look at me.

Please stare at me until I fall, madly, genuinely, in love with you. I will cheerfully and freely swim inside your thoughts, your psyche, and your heart. I will drift, leap, float, dive, anywhere for you; no matter how shallow or deep your river will be. I will gladly drown in the ocean of your love, until I can secure and anchor you back to the safety of my shoreline.

With all the love that you’re showing, let me thank you for making my heart so happy and blessed. Thank you for noticing a golden sunrise in my sunset. And for allowing me to find the soothing glow of a purplish dusk when I get sunburned from too much light.

Thank you for blessing my squall with your calmness.   Thank you for believing that I can still bring purple rain to my otherwise greying soul. Thank you for seeing the goodness of my soul.

❤❤❤

Ash

posted from Bloggeroid

Shrine of Saint Andrew Kim

Blue skies. Sunny day. It was a perfect day for an out of town trip. I originally planned a solo trip to Bulacan, and I am so glad that my friends joined me.

As a K-drama fan who has a tight budget to visit Korea just yet, we decided to visit St Andrew of Kim Taegon church in Lolomboy, Bulacan. Nikki, Bobby and I met in Makati Avenue as early as 630am. We have had our snacks ready – chips, candies, lettuce and celery and Bobby’s special sandwich with egg spread! Hahaha.

After having a tummy filling breakfast at Lugawan ni Bro in SB, we went straight to Lolomboy. Thanks to waze and google maps, we’ve reached our destination in no time.

Upon arrival, we were told by the guards to use the other entrance – two blocks away from the main one. The church is open for public at 10am onwards- no entrance fee. We arrived half an hour early but was lucky enough that they allowed us in.  There are Korean nuns tending their gardens  – feeling naming part kami ng K-drama. The ever famous ‘Annyeong haseyo’ has been used and abused. Hahaha J Nikki asked if we can take a picture with them but they declined. So, yeah, simplehan nyo na lang mga bes.

The structure and architecture are impressive. We didn’t go inside the church, but according to the care takers, it’s open for public. And since this is a church, silence should be observed. We’ve spent an hour wandering around the church – taking lots of selfies and pictures of the complex.

Photo: Mine

Photo: Bob

photo: Bob

Photo: Bob 

How to get there via private car:

Take the Bocaue exit in NLEX or follow McArthur highway to reach Barangay Lolomboy, Bocaue, Bulacan.

                 
Photos: Mine and Bob's.

                 
Cheers!
Ash xx

                         

2016 Timeline

It has been my yearly tradition to list down the highlights and lowlights of my life – like an annual look back.  I am writing this kind of stuff not just to document and remember things, but also to remind myself to be grateful at all times, despite the situation.

2016 is a combination of heart breaks and new beginnings. A year full of tears, brokenness and rough patches. But this is also the year where I learned to start anew. Life is hard, but I am holding on tight to what I know to be true.

Now, let’s take a look on my 2016 :

January - The thrill on the final touches on my sister’s wedding and of course the magical day for the whole family – thanks to all who joined and helped us on this special event in my sister’s life.

My family at UCCP- CEC

February – A simple valentine date with Gino and another Baguio Get Away with my family. 

Mines View Park, Baguio

Camp John Hay, Baguio

March – My sister’s pregnancy announcement, a quick catch up with CVG friends and trip to Kalayaan- Majayjay Laguna with friends.

Kwentuhan over pizza and pasta

An obligatory picture with my former UMYF :)

April –Random Dinner dates with friends. A long weekend in Cebu . 

Midweek Dinner with L.A and Kat. 

Bantayan Island, Cebu

Bantayan Island, Cebu

Yooneek - Bantayan Island Cebu

May: {Break Up}. Cagbalete Get Away. Beers and Bikinis. Sunburns in our cheeks. Random eat out with Friends. Staycation. 

On our way to Cagbalete Island

Ang babae sa Isla. :)

We prayed for a peaceful election. #PhElection2016

Breakfast @Belmont Manila. 

Staycation at Belmont 

June - Quick Baguio get away with ERM family. Lots of eat outs this month.

Mines View
Ralph, Me, Iara, Alther and Kingsley

Session Road Baguio
Iara, Kinglsey, Raplh, Me, and Joel

Dinner at Viking Jazz 

July - {Grandma passed away.} Went back to Alabat Island with family and church mates. 

On our way to Alabat Island to attend my Lola's wake 

Heaven on Earth Beach resort

August: Birthday month - La Union and Baguio Get away. Sunday brunches. Lots of cakes and cupcakes on rainy nights. Met my highschool friends. {Ginger's death) 

Highschool Friends
Aya, Vanie and Me 

China Sea, La Union

Gapuz grape Farm

September - A big stack of books I'd been dying to read. Coffee and crosswords in bed. Movie marathon- Kdrama and Hallmark Movies. Cupcakes and Pies. 

October: Weekend get away in Bataan and Subic. Cancer Awareness month. 

Today, we wear #Pink 

November: Spur-of-the-moment dinner dates and movie nights with Sue Ramirez. 1^st time to see Leandro Michio’s smile – my 1^st nephew!Zumba and boxing session with my CWT family. 

My 1day old nephew - Leandro Michio  

Dinner with Sue, Moi and Andrea at Lugang Cafe 

VIP seats at Uptown Mall, watching Dr Strange :)

Another Dinner/Movie date with this pretty lady - Sue Ramirez

Picture Picture before our Boxing Session :)

Zumba Wednesday with this lovelies

December: Parties and bohos and festive nights. 2 years at CWT. Lots of dinner invites. Year end catch up with old friends. 

 

Received an award that night. yay! 

With ER&M and Melcorp Team
L-R Ces, Nikki, Me, Jacq, Iara
Top (L-R) Marga, LA and Joel

Nonetheless, 2016 is full of sad endings, thrilling opportunities and beautiful beginnings. Here’s to 2016 and to the coming great year of 2017! 

Love,

Ash

Let her be.

Her psyche is breathlessly gorgeous.

She stumbled into the midst of the ugliest, most aching, and painful battle, 

and then grew the most stunning wings.

And soar.

She soared above the heavy clouds of tears and sadness, 

attempting to sprinkle her glimmering dust of joy.

She is a brave, lovely, and fair maiden - full of hopes and dreams.

She yearned to kiss the rain and drink in its sweet raindrops.

Let her be.

Don’t put her in a dungeon.

Let her fly and see her inner beauty.

Let her see her worth and value.

Allow her eyes to sparkle and her voice to be heard.

Let her re-discover the world.

Travel and create great memories with her.

Don’t take her for granted.  

Fly with her.

Appreciate everything about her.

Don't compare her wings to anyone else's. She owns it, and she worked hard for it.

She deserves nothing but the best.

See her beautiful world and embrace her innocence and kindness.

She want nothing but your love.

Don't break her wings. It took a long time for her to grow such beautiful wings.

Shower her with love and let her heart flourish.

Guard her heart as you guard yours. Her heart is frail, but it is true.

She doesn't want half-hearted relationships.

She values your heart as a precious stone and will take good care of you.

She will always prove your worth.

She will cheer you up and would never ever leave you.

She's a fighter. She is both brave and vulnerable.

Don't be perplexed or pass judgment on her based on her moods.

She’s a woman with a girl’s innocent heart

and beneath her beautiful wings are the scars of yesterday.

xx

Ash

Lost.

Sometimes, I can't see what I'm looking for.

Is it the life of a traveler, with thoughts of becoming someone?

Is it the life of a liar, with the face of a happy girl, pretending to be ok?
Is it the life of a hopeless romantic, holding her scarred heart?

Who am I anyway? Why am I doing this?

Sometimes I wish I had chosen lesser complications in life. Some days remind me of things left undone, untold im sorrys and the dreaded hollowness. Sometimes I feel like all the cells I was born with is dying.

I’ve been crying my eyes out, alone in my room, while that mascara drains off and my eyelids are swollen. I tried so hard not to hurt anyone, even when they did everything possible to hurt every fiber of my being.

xx

Of Love and Waiting

Almost always, when we fall in love so swiftly, we are likely to fall for someone who doesn't deserve our love. We even let ourselves believe that it’s true love. We are being duped by their saccharine poisonous words. We were blinded by the dazzling glitters of their promises. Then we'll realize that we squandered our time, blood, sweat, tears, and love for that brief period of relationship.

We should not be wasting our tears and time on those who want shortcuts, are reckless, and hit and run. Those people will not help you grow as a person. They will simply suck all of your happiness and seize your dreams.

Stoplights remind us to take a moment to enjoy life, to let go and relax, and to be grateful for what we have. Slow down. Do not rush.

Just because we paused, changed lanes, or avoided those toxic people in our lives does not diminish our worth as human beings. We're actually doing it correctly. Lao Tzu's go with the flow is overrated.

We must learn to create our own waves in order to reach the ocean of bliss and contentment. We should not be influenced by social media or what is popular and trending. We can be unique - in a positive way.

Life should be nurtured and cherished. Feed and strengthen your heart. Let us not force ourselves to fit in, blend in, and bend our personalities in order for them to love us. Don't rush. Take it slow and easy. Relax. Hang tight.

You'll get to our destination soon. You'll meet someone who is eager to take the wheel for you. Someone who will not take shortcuts, someone who will carefully show you the way so you can enjoy the sweet twists and turns of life, and both of you will savor each moment and enjoy the view.

You'll meet someone who has goals rather than dreams. Someone who will fall in love with our souls rather than our bodies. Someone who will adore your brilliant mind, wit, and sense of humour. Someone who will accept and embrace everything about your beautiful self and will not use your past to make you feel bad about yourself. You'll meet someone who will prioritize you and will not allow anyone, not even his closest friends, to interfere with your relationship. Someone who will not make you feel like an outcast in his group. Someone who will make you feel appreciated because you are a treasure. Someone who will build a palace for you and make you his queen.

We are diamonds, gold, and all the other precious stones.

We must understand our worth and value.

We deserve to be treated with respect.

Allow no one to control you or abuse you, either mentally or physically. You do not deserve any of these things. If you must, if you can, and if you have enough time, stay away. Be brave. You are strong.

You are beautiful. 

love,

Ash B. ❤

Feliz Compleano, self.

**** Disclaimer – This is a late birthday post, but it’s still August anyway :)

It has become an annual tradition for me to write about my birthday. I awoke around 3 a.m. because my alarm clock kept beeping. When I checked my phone, birthday messages had begun to pour in! My mother sent me birthday greetings with the question "When are you getting married?! ”. Great! Excellent! Hahaha. My sister came next, with all her well wishes and the ever-popular question, "When are you getting married?" Come on guys, are you in a hurry?!  

How quickly time passes. As I get older, I notice that each year passes faster and that life moves faster. I can say that despite my age, I still look young (hahahah), but I honestly feel old on the inside. As soon as I finish my work, I want to go home and lie down, read books, watch online movies, or surf the internet –  that sort of things.

Life is good, but I feel old – mentally, emotionally, and physically. My body felt different – I gained weight, my blood pressure slightly increased, and I had back and shoulder pain. Don't laugh or roll your eyes; it's true! Now that I'm a year older, I'm ready to face new challenges. I've experienced life's highs and lows. I overthink. I get nervous. I compared myself to others. I cried. I laughed.  I fell in and out of love. With all of this happening to me, I decided to treat myself - not by buying anything fancy for my birthday, but by giving myself a break.

While travelling to La Union, I'm scribbling a "what I've learned" list on a purple post-it note, and here's a portion of it.

You cant please everybody, so do your thing.

I used to be a people pleaser. I don't want people to be upset with me just because I didn't give or do what they wanted. But as I've gotten older, I've realized that it's not the case! You can't please everyone. Whatever you do in life will still be criticized, so do what makes you happy. Don't let them deter you. If you listen to every negative comment from those people, you'll end up feeling sorry for yourself. Smile.

        Let loose.

Stop worrying so much. It gets you nowhere. Stop overthinking. Worrying is pointless and, yes, stupid! Try to take a deep breath and appreciate the wonders of the world. Cry if you have been hurt by someone. But don't stop there. Give yourself a break. Have fun.

Be nice. Don’t be a bitch.

I understand that we all have those moments when we are grumpy, cranky, and annoyed – and those around us suffer as a result. That is normal. We all have those moments, but don't let it become a habit. You can't be a jerk all the time. Be pleasant and smile. You had no idea what the other person was going through. He may have needed a hug or a simple smile, but you yelled at him or rolled your eyes at her. Being a bitch is the most horrific thing in the world. Let us spread love and positive energy.

 Give yourself a “me time”.

As the saying goes, "all work and no play makes John a dull boy." You deserve some me time at least once a month. Get a relaxing foot spa or a body massage. Get a new look. Paint your toes red. Get that hot red lipstick. Doing these things is extremely therapeutic for me. Believe me, it is!

Love never fails. People Do.

We all get hurt. We all feel bad after a failed relationship, don’t  be bitter about life and about love. Love’s one of the best gifts given to us. People are not perfect so don’t look for a perfect love story. But hey, there’s one best love story I knew – John 3:16.

Those are the top five items on my list. I have a few more, but I'll save those for my next post. Anyway, my life has been bumpy, and it isn't as #flawless as it appears on my social media accounts. I simply choose to post positive things about myself in order to spread positive energy. I, for one, do not want to see negative content in my newsfeed, so why should I post it? But, hey, the hashtag #blessed is real, because I am and always will be blessed

Oh, by the way, let me share you my birthday experience, up north! 



Day 1 La Union.

• Gapuz farm
•  Ma-cho Temple
• Halo-halo de Iloko
• China Sea beach Resort

Grape picking is now off my bucket list, yay! We had a fantastic time at Gapuz Farm. Our next stop is at Ma-cho Temple. You can say a prayer and light the incense sticks for free (you can donate btw). We had lunch at Halo-halo de Iloko, where we ordered papaitan, pork binagoongan, and their famous fiesta halo halo. We arrived at China Sea Beach resort in the late afternoon. We haven't been able to enjoy the beach because the weather has been extremely bad and swimming is unsafe. But we had a great time swimming at the pool.

Day 2 Baguio.

• Naguilan Road View Deck
• Café in The Sky

This is our first trip down Naguilan Road. I was nervous and tense because the road to Baguio is narrow and steep. We finally saw this magnificent view after more than an hour! Wow! It's absolutely breathtaking! It piqued our interest, so we pulled over and took a few photos. I'll always love Baguio - the cool breeze, the scent of vanilla and pines, and this panoramic view.

After a few minutes, we took Mt Cabuyao Road and arrived at Café in the Sky around 3 or 4 p.m. The area was covered in fog, and it was raining! Hahaha. It could have been more beautiful if it hadn't been raining. I had visions of a sea of cotton clouds – haha. But it's not what I expected. Nonetheless, the experience is priceless. We left at 6 p.m. and returned to Manila.

My takeaway - I'm sure life will throw me a lot of challenges; I'll still have ups and downs, but isn't that the grand traverse of life? I'm confident that as I get older, age will be just a number. Cheers to living for today, without regrets, comparisons, or insecurities. Thank you for making my life so wonderful.

Love,

Ash xx